sprayhawk

My daily life is really interesting.  The thing you gotta know about me is that I’m a rule breaker.  Right on the q-tip box it says don’t put them in your ears.  Not intended for ears.  But I don’t care.  I’m a rule breaker.  I pick a q-tip out and I put one end in one ear and swab it around deep down right up to the eardrum.  Hello eardrum, I’m here to clean you so that you can do your job.  Your welcome.  Then I flip the q-tip around and stick that end my other ear.  And I swab it like the goddamn poop deck.  I swab it up and it feels so good.  It feels so good when that tip is deep in there and then I pull it out and I look at it.  I always look at it.  I look at it and it’s all covered in yellow goo.  And my ears feel like sunshine.  They feel like sunshine is pouring out of them so clean and clear.  And I look back at the q-tip, which is covered in goo, and sometimes I’ll just lay there in bed with that q-tip next to me, smoking a cigarette, and just reflecting on the whole thing.  Like, I’ll ask the q-tip, “Did that feel good?”  and the q-tip will just lay there next to me in awed silence, too pleased to know what to say.  And sometimes I’ll take the q-tip out to breakfast, and then at the last minute I’ll say that we are going to split the bill and the q-tip will look kind of annoyed.  But I can do what I want because splitting the bill is progressive.  Equal rights.  Equal bills.  That’s fair.  I don’t care if the q-tip got a small biscuits and gravy and I got the T-bone with extra bacon and two large glasses of orange juice.  Split it down the fucking middle.  And then I’ll give the q-tip one last look and I’ll give a fake number and walk off.  There’s a lot of q-tips in the box, you know?  A lot of fish in the sea.